Today’s guest on the Fitlandia Podcast is AJ Dexter, husband of host Christa King. Join them as they partner up to talk (and laugh!) about the recent half marathon they participated in together.
The Power of Partnership to Thrive
After five years of marriage, AJ and Christa decided to take their fitness to the next level together in 2018.
AJ is a rock climber, so some of his fitness goals centered around that, like climbing a steeper grade. He also set a goal to complete three half-marathons. Also, he had body recomposition goals that would involve weight-training, etc. Christa also has body recomposition goals, focusing on greater lean muscle mass. Reading a book by Timothy Ferriss, “The 4-Hour Body” motivated AJ to look into dexa scans. He and Christa jump-started their recomposition goals by getting scanned at Dexa PDX, body composition experts in Portland.
Christa’s recomposition goal is to move from 29% body fat to 25% by her 46th birthday. She aims to be more fit at forty-six than she was at twenty-six, when she ran her first marathon. She invites you to stop right now, go to the Fitlandia Fitness Members Only Facebook Forum page, and request to join the closed group, so that you can cheer her on and follow her journey towards this goal as she reports on it each week.
While AJ and Christa are on the same page as a couple, Christa acknowledges that often people, including many she works with in her 30 Days to Thriving community, do not have the support of a partner when it comes to fitness goals. She encourages listeners of this podcast to share this episode with a reluctant partner or with someone who struggles with a resistant partner, because it is a great blessing to find the power to shift and thrive together. And for those who have to travel the road to change alone, Christa is proud to recommend her Fitlandia family as a place of acceptance and motivation.
AJ finds that even if their goals are not identical, he can still show up to be supportive for Christa in her journey and she feels likewise. Each individual in the accountability partnership still has to connect to their own personal “why”. So individually, and as a couple, they mentally and physically prepared for their first 2018 half-marathon.
Spring Training Struggle
Christa is not a newcomer to running half-marathons and marathons. She felt like starting out in the new year, there was plenty of time to prepare for their half-marathon event in May. They started out with walk-run pacing and strength-training. But Christa quickly realized that she was struggling. Even though it was slowing down their training goals, Christa needed to respect her body. She checked in with Portland naturopath Dr. Jerome Craig, a former podcast guest. Testing revealed she was dealing with a serious vitamin B-12 deficiency and some anemia.
This explained why she was so easily fatigued only a mile into her training runs. Combine this with the fact that AJ had never even run more than nine miles at a stretch, and they realized that their plan to compete in (or just complete!) a half-marathon two months down the road was on thin ice. Still, they pressed forward. They absolutely knew that if nothing else, they could walk the distance.
Digging Deep
When the struggle was real, they dug down deep and recalled their personal “Why”. Why was it important to complete this half marathon? Why was it important they complete it together, no matter what? Defining the why is critical to success.
Priming with Ketosis
They also wanted to approach training with a non-conventional nutrition approach. It was important for Christa to do the run in a state of ketosis, so there would be no carb-loading for her. Christa has learned that her body feels best when she is getting 60-70 percent of her calories from protein. In her past experience, being in ketosis has helped her endurance. So, about 10 days before the event, she restricted her carbs to 50 grams per day. She expected she could rely on ketosis to prime her body, yet it was the first time that she would do a big run in a such a state.
Husband AJ was in a bit of a panic one week out. Because it had been so long since he’d run consistently, and because he had never run a half-marathon, he was having self-doubts. Also, his past reliance on carbohydrates made him wonder if he could make it in ketosis. He was questioning his dietary needs.
Trouble at Terrebonne
Their half-marathon event was held outside of Bend, Oregon in Terrebonne near Smith Rock State Park, a beautiful place that they knew and they loved. They arrived on a Friday evening, and settled in for sleep, knowing they had to be up at 5 a.m. for the run. They awoke refreshed at the crack of dawn, excited for the challenge ahead. When they got on the shuttle bus to the location, there was only one other rider. This seemed unusual for a popular event. They became a bit suspicious when they arrived at the parking lot to find only a few cars.
At the check-in booths, the attendants could not find their names on the participant list. AJ looked around and noticed that the few others who had arrived were extremely fit individuals! Christa insisted they check the list again, as she scrolled her email for her confirmation. “You know, the half-marathon!”, she said with exasperation. The attendant responded, “That’s tomorrow! Today is the 50K trail run.”
Mindset Reset
Christa shares that in this moment she realized how much transformation she has truly undergone. She says that her former self would have spun out into a complete meltdown over her mistake. Now, instead of losing it, she was able to laugh about it. She and AJ went on to just let the day unfold “magically”, enjoying a spontaneous free day in Bend.
Later, however, Christa, who suffers from insomnia, realized that she did not have her sleep supplement for the night. To make things worse, their overnight neighbor had a barking dog! Again, she made a decision to hold on to a positive mindset. She was grateful for her time rooted in Fitlandia’s Four Cornerstones of Fitness, one of which is Mindset Mastery.
Back on Track
Next morning, they made the decision to avoid sugary energy snacks and liquids, choosing instead to power up with coffee and coconut oil. This combination gave them a boost of energy and a source of clean-burning fuel. They stuck with a run-walk strategy for pacing in order to simply to complete the half-marathon. Things got off to an excellent start.
A Tale of Happy Endurance
However, around Mile Eight the “moral of the story” kicked in. AJ admits that around mile seven his mind really started pulling up negative thoughts. He could identify this as a pattern of his and reminded himself that these thoughts serve no purpose but to discourage. So he made an effort to actively reframe those thoughts and sailed through until mile ten. At that point, the distractions became as much physical suffering as mental.
Christa says that she is really motivated when people around her are relying on her to keep her head together. So she began drawing on the little strategies that she and AJ use regularly to keep each other in a positive mindset. One of these is daily Gratitude Surge; sharing eleven things back and forth that they are grateful for. As they grew wearier mentally and physically, this exercise served as a distraction from discomfort and also a means of shifting internal dialogue. They also really started marveling about the majesty and resilience of the human body.
Because they were not approaching the event from a conventional performance perspective, but with a spirit of just getting out and doing their best, they had no choice but to succeed. AJ didn’t feel this way, however, at mile 12. He calls this his “shut-down” phase. He has experienced this on long hikes or rock climbing ventures. It feels as if his mind just shuts down and all he can do is put one foot in front of the other He admits he became a little “surly” when Christa offers him encouragement at this phase, even though he knows she kept him going.
Bringing Up the Rear With Cheer
They laugh together as they tell about being dead last in the event at this point. The race coordinators at each station were just waiting for them to pass so they could break the station down. They felt the need to give the paramedic a “thumbs-up” so he would know they were all right! Though they appeared to be “The Bad News Bears” of the race, they felt like winners. They were determined not to beat themselves up, but instead to finish joyfully together.
Coming last could have been hard for Christa, who has been super competitive in the past. But no shame. Just a sense of pride in themselves, their bodies, their mindsets, and each other. And Christa was thrilled that they finished within the time frame that she had hoped they would. They also basked in the camaraderie of the running community...everyone there to move, to run, to challenge themselves and to support each other.
Nutrition Headstart and Mindset Mastery
Christa King reminds podcast listeners that no matter whether you are running a marathon or moving purposely for five minutes at a time, if that is your goal, then celebrate that! It should be about honoring your body and pushing to the next level in a way that keeps you feeling safe, but also gets you motivated. AJ feels that celebration of whatever activity you’re doing will reinforce that positive energy.
This was the first time that Christa ran with nutrition education under her belt. She knew to prepare with smaller portions, focus on protein, start with coconut oil, and snack around mile seven. She said she has never felt that good, physically, during an endurance event. Afterward, they took advantage of still-warm bodies to stretch thoroughly before getting food and driving home. The only immediate discomfort was
some nausea at that recovery meal. But in spite of expecting to be stiff and sore for days after the event, AJ and Christa felt fine.
Christa says she has never recovered so quickly. And she was also pleasantly surprised that she didn’t get worn out and crash afterward, even though she had so little sleep. She attributes one hundred percent of her endurance and recovery success to her nutrition. That also has an effect on mindset. If we are feeling physically good, properly fueled, we aren’t going to get as mentally fatigued. AJ agrees completely. He says he has done much less and felt much worse. He attributes his better recovery to keto nutrition and kettlebell exercises during training.
Friendly Advice for Success
If you are facing your next goal feeling overwhelmed and stuck, AJ advises: Take a single step toward the simplest version of that goal.
Christa recommends the following practical steps for getting over the hump and advancing toward your goal:
If you found yourself soothed by the sound of guest AJ Dexter's voice in today's podcast, you are in for an extra treat. He is the mystery voice behind the motivational meditation Mind Zoning® Healthy Suggestion Surge. Download it here for free.
For more on the topic of goal-setting from host Christa King and guests, check out the previous Fitlandia podcast, Radical Goal-Setting. And now that you are half-way around the calendar from your New Year's resolutions, get on board for the live event or webinar, New Year's Resolution Revival.
Today, along with CEO of Cardsmith, Monica Burrell, experience a live, unedited transformational coaching session similar to those led by Christa King each week in the Fitlandia Fitness 30 Days to Thriving Program. There, host Christa King helps participants navigate those really tough challenges they are confronted with while making amazing lifestyle changes. You can hop on board for the June 30 Days To Thriving. For a 25 percent discount, enter code: friend25 at checkout.
Now, join Monica Borrell and host Christa King as they get real with each other and today’s listeners. It’s a little scary to expose your inner self during a live coaching session, but there is so much power in vulnerability. Stories of transformation need to be told; they offer courage to the next person.
Who are You, Monica Borrell?
Monica calls herself a “serial entrepreneur”; she has started several businesses. Cardsmith is definitely her “child”...it is her most exciting and most challenging business venture. It is software as a service. She describes it as a virtual sticky notes brainstorming wall that can help individuals or teams engage in visual problem- solving.
Host Christa King admits that like many of her program participants, she is a “planner junkie”, overwhelmed with thoughts, ideas, projects. “Anything that we can do to simplify things, and streamline things is just awesome.” That’s why she recommends tools like Monica’s Cardsmith software and her own Strategic Vitality planner.
Intersecting Journeys
Christa entered the “start-up scene” a few years ago, first joining Woman Led, where she crossed paths with Monica. Christa admits that since then, she has been caught up in the culture of “do more, do more”. She knows how hard it is, whether you are a start-up exec or a busy mother, to make yourself and your health a priority. Fortunately for Christa, her business, Fitlandia Fitness, has become her own health journey along the way.
At about the same time, Monica started her journey with her own woman led start-up, Cardsmith. She survived a lot of financial stress and hard times, as well as the excitement of a thriving relationship. However, the combination of stress-eating and happy-eating, lots of travel, and long working hours led to a physical gain of thirty pounds.
Christa remarks that many people are not aware of the time, money, resources, and sacrifice of going all-in for a new start-up business. And nothing is more important during such a stressful venture as a sense of community connection.
Monica Meets Fitlandia
Monica was involved in one of the first programs that Christa King offered a few years ago. She continued to take part in a Keto program, as well as Fitlandia’s 30 Days to Thriving elimination diet program, most recently. 30 Days to Thriving provides a structure for overcoming addiction to sugar, refined carbs, and alcohol while healing the gut and reducing inflammation. It’s about taking a break from certain foods, getting healthy, and then adding things back slowly in moderation, while you carefully observe the effect they have on your body.
Keep Moving Forward
Monica admits that she struggles with consistency in working toward health goals, and has been in and out of various Fitlandia programs. Host Christa King reminds us that whether you are feeling successfully “all-in” to a program or not, what’s important is the evolution of your journey. Christa defines success in the program as getting out of your head and into your body. Success is when you really start making mental connections about your food triggers and your relationship with food. And replacing unhealthy habits with things that better serve your goals.
Monica agrees, offering that she knows that Fitlandia has helped her to move forward. For one thing, it has helped her zero in on what kind of food life makes her feel the best and she has a new awareness of what happens when she wanders away from that. As a bonus, she is happy to report that in spite of ups and downs, she has lost almost ten pounds since joining the Fitlandia community.
Coach Christa Asks Monica to Share Her Discoveries
Some of Monica’s discoveries about food that works for her:
Getting Honest
Christa asks if Monica finds herself back in a carb-craving cycle “the next day” after late night wine leads to a Taco-Bell binge, for instance. Monica says she feels horrible the next day, but since participating in 30 Days to Thriving, she can usually get back into her Keto food life within a day. However that first day she thinks: “Well, I blew it and I gotta get back on Keto because I know that I’m going to feel better…” and then adds, laughing, “but while I’m here why don’t I just have a little snack!” Host Christa King admits that this is the honest reality for most of us!
Reframing Negative Thoughts
Christa is excited today to help Monica learn more about herself and about overcoming obstacles that keep her “stuck.” She points out that in the time she has known her, Monica has become a master something critical to lifestyle change: reframing negative thoughts.
An essential component of Fitlandia is Mind Zoning® meditation. Monica has learned to create her own Mind Zoning® mantras and incorporate them into her daily mindset. They are positive affirmations or reframes of negative thoughts. An example might be: “I’m too busy to cook my own healthy meals,” reframed as “It’s easy for me to make some time to cook my own healthy meals.” What we tell our mind is what our bodies will execute! When we reinforce positive thoughts, we create strong new neural pathways and our decision-making begins to support those positive thoughts.
Time to Deep Dive
Christa probes Monica a little deeper, asking her why in those challenging moments, like making choices at a restaurant, does she NOT make decisions that will support her health goals? What keeps her from choosing the best possible options from the menu? Monica sighs, “That’s a good question!” For one, she admits to tiring of sticking to that ONE best option every time she visits a favorite restaurant. She misses variety in those situations. Christa empathizes, noting how important it is to acknowledge that it has to be about incorporating a dietary strategy with a target of 80-90 percent compliance. We all need to have some flexibility. However, she points out that in those situations we should become mindful, asking, “Is there something triggering this decision or am I simply just tired of the same old thing?” In the latter case, we need to allow ourselves to choose the next best thing, without any shame. The consciousness of the decision is ultimately what is important.
I’m Taking a Break From ________.
Monica shares that alcohol is her toughest challenge when it comes to sticking to her healthy lifestyle changes. Evening card games with friends are a great way to have fun and enjoy a sense of community, but often lead to late night drinking. Alcohol contributes a lot of sabotaging sugar load and triggers craving cycles that can really get her off track quickly. Christa relates to that, adding that working hard and finishing projects...that sense of needing to celebrate...is a known trigger for her own indulgence. But she has learned how to step back when she forgets what moderation looks like. She creates a new Mind Zoning® mantra that soon leads to decisions for changed behavior.
Coach Christa encourages Monica and podcast listeners to experiment with what it looks and feels like to simply “take a break” from sugar, or processed food, or alcohol. Set a period of time to explore moderation or refrain completely. Use that time wisely. Without pressure, observe how easy it can actually be, how good it makes you feel down the road. Become curious about your connection to things in your food life. What triggers set you off? What traditions automatically set you up?
Contemplating the Million Dollar Question
How have your social encounters come to depend on your food (or drink) life? There is great power of revelation in this question. Christa urges Monica and all to contemplate when and how this first became your social pattern. In Monica’s case, she remembers that cocktail hour was the daily construct for her parents to unwind with conversation together before dinner. It was just a familiar pattern for the occurrence of comfortable connection that seemed to work...her elderly parents have been married a long time, so it seemed like a recipe for success. So she and her husband carry on similar rituals.
What Would it Look Like If…
The next step is to make an opportunity to really get curious about what the same social scenario would look like without alcohol (or sugar, or fast food, or junk food, etc.) The Fitlandia 30 Days to Thriving Program is a perfect way for anyone to take a month to explore just that kind of possibility!
Identify the Tipping Point and Remember the WHY
Going even deeper, Coach Christa asks Monica to consider what it is in the moment that makes her finally give in. What makes her decide that what she is choosing to cave in to is more important than the well-being that comes from not caving. This is a very critical question for all to get real about. A way to be strong in that moment is to have a well established “WHY” that you can clearly recall. Why is this (break from alcohol, sugar, etc) important? What is going to be your greater thing to remember in those make-or-break moments? That is a foundational element in Christa King’s 30 Days to Thriving Program weekly motivational coaching.
Beware the Tiger
Even a well defined personal WHY cannot escape the tiger chasing you all day. Christa uses this metaphor to describe how compounded stress, good and bad stressors throughout the day, wear us down. The prefrontal cortex of the brain carries around our goals and holds up the WHY I AM TAKING A BREAK FROM (fill in the blank) card. But the primal brain is exhausted from being “chased by the tiger” all day and it says to the prefrontal cortex, “Shut up! I’m surviving here!” Basically when we are over-stressed, over-tired, under-fueled, our judgment lapses. The prefrontal cortex pulls out the lists of dos and donts, but the primal brain says, “Nope! We are DOING this (indulging)”. This is why it is so important to do our daily movement (exercise) in the morning before we are burned out. And to do our food prep and batch cooking on a restful day off, so that we are not confronted at the end of a busy weekday with no safe plan for dinner.
A Hard-Wire Re-Wire
The challenge is really to put all these self-evaluation considerations together in a way that allows you space to re-wire all those hard-wired patterns. It takes time, but with reframed thoughts, weekly coaching, and community connection, it can be easier than you ever thought possible. Start on your own by looking at your event calendar or conjuring up the next opportunity to test a re-wire. Imagine yourself in that trigger moment or challenging scenario and picture what you could do differently. In your mind, walk through the situation. What would it look like to see yourself choosing to serve your highest goals in that setting?
Monica walks through this mental exercise and determines that she is going to have to figure out a way to tell her primal brain, “You are not in charge!” That is what resonates with her and imagining herself empowered with that in the future is impacting her view of the achievable nature of real change. But she still isn’t sure how she will feel about it “on Friday night.”
Accept the Invitation
While Monica wonders if she can actually override her primitive brain on Friday night, Coach Christa invites her to commit to a goal, an action. She reminds her the choice is all hers. Christa asks, “Monica, it’s Friday night. What would you LIKE to do?” Monica responds, “I think I would like to have one drink” with the intention of observing what that decision and action feels like and what the results are.
Set Yourself Up for Success
Now that Monica has committed to a goal, Christa challenges her to determine what will set her up for success. These are the actions Monica thinks will help her:
Christa suggests more:
As the live coaching session ends, Christa is encouraged about how much we can inspire each other through our vulnerability and willingness to connect and share accountability. Monica feels like she has a full toolbox to face her primal brain on Friday night!
To experience transformational coaching with host Christa King, join the next 30 Days to Thriving Event, or register for the Mind Zoning® Academy, visit the Fitlandia Fitness website.
And take a look at guest Monica Borrell’s innovative Cardsmith visual problem-solving software.
Today on the Fitlandia Podcast, guest Helene Byrne, prenatal and postpartum exercise specialist, author, and founder of BeFit- Mom™, joins host Christa King of Fitlandia to discuss post-partum ab recovery.
How Did Helen Become a Prenatal and Postpartum Exercise Specialist?
After the birth of her son, Helene Byrne was dismayed that pregnancy had seemingly erased her prior fitness state, especially her ab tone and stability, in spite of the fact that she had continued to exercise throughout her pregnancy. She also discovered that no one was promoting postpartum exercise correctly! There had to be something beyond crunches for a new mom’s body recovery?! So she pulled from her experiences with pilates, yoga, and standard fitness training to create a postpartum rehab system that worked for her. And she was confident it would help others.
The Body Mechanics
During Pregnancy
Resulting in:
* too much curvature in both lower and upper back
* some muscle groups get too tight, while their opposing muscle groups become weak
Resulting in:
* slight widening of pelvis opening
* changes to connective tissue (ie: ligaments), throughout the body
Following Birth
Resulting in:
* potential misalignment in joints
* potential for bladder or uterus prolapse
What Exercises are Best During Pregnancy (Prenatal)?
Those that lengthen the muscles that tend to tighten up and those that strengthen the muscles which are prone to weakness.
What Exercises are Less Appropriate Postpartum?
Due to ligament laxity and weak abs, it can be uncomfortable and even unsafe to return immediately to high-impact exercises. Running, HIIT, CrossFit, weight-training, may put early postpartum women at risk for injury. Once your core is re-established, you can begin to return to your normal fitness routines more safely.
Why Traditional Ab Exercises Don’t Work Well Postpartum
After the birth of your baby, you may desire a return to flat, strong, well-functioning abs. But a weak transverse abdominis muscle means that a “crunch”- type exercise will allow for the bulging of muscle without the countering effect of compression. Also, midline tissue down the center of our body is composed of connective tissue, which has become lax and can stretch out too wide (diastasis recti). It needs to be closed, or things don’t return to normal.
In fitness, what you practice, is what you get! So trying to do traditional ab exercises, without having rehabbed your transverse abdominis is not a recipe for success. It will never close that midline, will never flatten your abs, and may promote the bulge that causes people years later to inquire, “When’s the baby due?”
Two Interrelated Steps to Proper Postpartum Fitness Recovery
[1] Rebuild Transverse Abdominis (deepest abdominal muscle, which compresses belly)
Using Abdominal Compression Exercises
[2] Rehab Pelvic Floor
Using Kegel Exercises
It is critical to rebuild the TVA and Pelvic Floor together because it is their job to function together in the body. In the beginning, during rebuild exercises like ab compressions or kegels, you may not sense successful contraction in either the abdominal muscles or pelvic floor muscles. Be patient; strength will slowly return.
How to Find Your Pelvic Floor
Sit near the corner edge of a hard chair, legs straddled. That will put your body weight right on your pelvic floor so that when you squeeze during kegel exercises, you sense engagement of the proper muscles.
How to Compress Your TVA
Sit on the edge of a chair and place your hands in the crease of your thighs at hip level. Now pull in your belly, away from your fingertips so that your hands have a little space. This is what you are going for with abdominal compression exercises.
Re-establish Good Alignment
After carrying and delivering a baby, many women end up with functional muscular imbalances, such as really tight hips, lower back, or chest. Such conditions may create unstable joints, making them more prone to injury. Part of re-establishing a strong core is to re-establish good alignment.
How Will I Know I’m Ready to Return to My Regular Fitness Routine?
Body Cues of Functional Stability:
How to Perform Toe Tap Test:
What if I Didn’t Have a Regular Fitness Routine Prior to Pregnancy?
Often following the birth of a child, something triggers in a woman the desire to get healthy.
Guest Helene Byrne of BeFit- Mom™ reminds us that “everyone has a mommy body following birth, everyone!”. It’s a phase; it’s transitional. And everyone can create positive fitness from that square one, forward.
Helene recommends:
Create a mindset that is healthy
Don’t compare yourself to others or social media images
DO her core rehab workout DAILY, after baby’s morning feeding
Take a daily fitness walk with baby
Create a fun schedule that includes Mommy and Me or Stroller Fitness classes with community!
Host Christa King of Fitlandia agrees with Helene’s recommendations, especially when it comes to community. She reminds listeners that Fitlandia is built on the Four Cornerstones of Fitness, of which Community Connection is one. We need community for both accountability and also validation and affirmation. So it is so important to choose a community group that is really positive. Fitlandia’s 30 Days to Thrive Program is a perfect opportunity.
Also, whether you’re a new mom wanting to get your healthy lifestyle back on track, or you’re just a busy individual needing to create some healthy habits, it all starts with your Mind. Christa King’s Mind Zoning® Academy may be just what you need to mentally prepare for any fitness rehab! And don’t forget to boost your strategic vitality!
Get Your Rest
Certainly, sleep is also crucial to postpartum fitness recovery. Anyone who has been an insomniac or worked a seventy hour week can relate to the desperation that comes from the sleep deprivation mothers of newborns experience. Ladies, sleep whenever you can!
Be Gentle With Yourself
Any change or transition comes with a big adjustment period. Your world has been flipped upside down, requiring you to respond by creating an adapted lifestyle and an adjusted identity around something new...whether it is a job, a move, a loss, or a BABY! Transition into motherhood in a mindful, gentle way. Being a new mom can trigger some psychological challenges, perhaps connected to your own relationship with your mother, or some body image issues going back to childhood. Be kind to yourself. Be really positive, really patient, and really dig into community connection. And give yourself permission to ask for help. Also, practice self-care with the mindset that as you put yourself together, you are setting an example for those you love and care for, including your new baby.
Today on the Fitlandia podcast #85, guests Mike McCastle and David Skolnik of Evolution Healthcare and Fitness (Portland, OR) join host Christa King of Fitlandia Fitness to help those struggling with reaching their goals by providing clarity about the process of successful goal-setting and goal achievement.
Why Set Goals?
Anyone can set mere goals. The importance lies in clarity. Setting CLEAR goals and considering WHY we are setting the goal will:
SMART and SMART(ER)
Fitlandia’s 30 Days to Thrive Program members are encouraged to use SMART goal strategy, to bring clarity and focus to their journey.
The SMART(ER) acronym reminds that we should set goals for ourselves which are Specific, Measurable, Action-oriented/Achievable, Realistic, Time-bound PLUS: we must regularly Evaluate, and Revise our goals.
Many of us have really demanding, high expectations; we launch into things without understanding what’s really “under the hood”. Members often want to lose weight FAST. No, no, no...slow down! First things first. Focus on the Four Cornerstones of Fitness: Change behaviors around food, get moving, think positively, connect with your community. Jumping into a goal can be disillusioning, especially for perfectionists!
That is why the EVALUATE and REVISE aspects of the SMART(ER) strategy is so important. We need to be gentle with ourselves, observing our journey as it unfolds. Today’s guests add to that: Be gentle; yet analytical. Recording and tracking progressions daily, weekly gives us a tool to review and adjust our goal and/or the actions that are getting us to that goal.
Process Goals Lead to Successful Outcomes
Mike and David also point out that a goal with no steps is very unlikely to be met. There is a difference between outcome goals and process goals. An “outcome goal” is something like “lose 20 pounds”. A “process goal” is what you need to do to move along toward a clear outcome goal. For example, in order to reach an outcome goal of losing 20 pounds, you may incorporate process goals of 2 days strength training, 3 days cardio workout; tailored diet meal plan.
If we create process goals but only focus mindset on outcome goal, we lose sight of the process and ultimately, the goal is unmet. The outcome goal doesn’t ground us in the present. Instead, it’s always looking into the future. Remember, an initial requirement for a clear goal is that it draws us into the MOMENT. So in order to have success, we must be mindful our process goals, constantly evaluating and revising.
What is a Secret Goal?
David and Mike describe a secret goal like this: an athlete may say, “My goal is to compete in an Iron Man and I just want to finish with the pack”. But secretly, that person may be desiring a Top -20 finish and would be upset if they didn’t achieve at that level--then those feelings will get in the way of any positive feelings about the stated goal… and that disappointment will affect the next training cycle. Many are afraid to articulate their secret goal--afraid of the pressure that will come or the level of commitment it will take to get there
Christa King suggests that’s where Mind Zoning® comes in! The Mind Zoning® Academy helps us learn to set boundaries and give ourselves permission to make ourselves and our health-related goals a priority. This strengthens our ability to commit to the process goals that move us forward toward meeting our treasured secret outcome goals!
Why is Community Important to Success?
One of the secrets to making fitness easier is to work out or train with a group! Especially one with the same goal. Your tribe will:
Lack of engagement in the community is the biggest indicator that a person may not meet with success. Christa King reminds us that Community Connection is often the sustaining factor for process goals. That is why the community is at the heart of her 30 Days to Thrive program.
Say No to Shame...and Yes to Tribe
Guests from Evolution Fitness warn us about “fitness shaming”: the accusatory tones friends use when probing about your habits, ie: “Why do you go to the gym six days a week?” or the funny looks you get when you order your burger with a lettuce wrap. People become uncomfortable when seeing someone take action toward a goal. There’s a cognitive “spotlight” effect that seems for them to highlight areas of performance in their own life that they know need work. It makes people feel vulnerable and defensive.
However, the act of suffering together IN A GROUP for the sake of a goal seems to shut down that pre-frontal cortex, so the defensiveness gives way to unity with the group and for the good of the group. Functioning in a community literally helps us get out of our own way.
Christa expounds on this idea: We are wired to show up for our tribe. Use that as a motivator. Also, remember not to take personally others’ reactions to your goal-reaching processes and lifestyle changes. The subconscious really just wants to protect us from change. Knowledge helps us to override that. For example: Unless someone was a real jerk, he/she would never encourage an alcoholic friend to “have just one drink”. And yet, if someone is trying to take a break from sugar, friends tempt relentlessly. It is this pervasive lack of knowledge about sugar addiction along with the subconscious fear of change, rather than maliciousness, that causes people to react negatively to our attempts to set and reach our health and fitness goals.
What About FAILURE?
Evolution Fitness points out that any high achiever has failed many, many times. We should ascribe to the school of “Fail often; fail forward”. The more you fail, the more feedback you get. Immediate feedback is healthy; each failure is part of the process: a sort of report card of “where I was and where I am now”. When you fail, don’t make an immediate concession of your goal! Take that as positive feedback--quantifiable data-- with which to evaluate and revise your process goals. How you perceive failure is more important than the failure itself. The only real failure is quitting.
Christa King adds that there is no need for shame; no room for shame! Look on “failure” as if you were an observer in the room. What was going on that led up to it? Gather the information you need to be successful in the long run.
Consider Your Locus of Control
Those who complain and blame rely on external locus of control. Learn to shift from an external locus of control to an internal one. Taking responsibility and coming up with solutions shifts to internal and allows us more sense of power over our choices. This allows us an ability to view failure more productively, leading to better choices in the future. Turning to external factors is “failing backward”, not forward. Eliminate excuses, become the warrior, get the results you want! Our guest expounds: One of the Four Buddhist Noble Truths is that life begins with struggle...to exist is to struggle. What matters for success is what people do in that struggle to endure: Do you fight/flight/give up?...or do you find a moment to transcend and elevate?